The Prince and Princess of Wales. For a long time they were the opposite poles of a dichotomy of love and hate. Diana was ofcourse the centre of all affection. Because weirdly, I related to her. I identified with her. Because her words, were able to contain my pain. Naturally all my hatred was channelled to Charles, just as popular media wanted me to think.
But of late, during the lockdown our family sat down to watch “The Crown”. This series spoke to me on a different level. It was essentially therapeutic for me. Season 3 revealed to me a different side of Charles. A different side to the familiar story, an untold story. For the first time in forever, I felt for Charles.
Ofcourse I do not know where to draw the line between fact and fiction. I do know, as always fictional was more lovable than real. But knowing better, I can do better. I do realize now that my hatred towards Charles was in fact, my resentment towards those who’ve hurt me, in disguise. I feel sorry for Charles and Diana and now, I find myself trying to understand Camilla.
Unlike before, I refrain from holding anyone accountable for the tragic episodes of this relationship. In a world where information is rationed, cooked and spoon fed to common man like myself, the best thing to be done is to avoid taking sides. I’d like to believe that it just happened. They are all ordinary, imperfect, fallible people, just like me- timid, quivering and stumbling before God’s grand scheme for this universe
This was a pleasant failure from my side. It just revealed to me how much of a judgmental brute I had been. It also showed me how ignorant I can be about it. In essence this failure opened my eyes to one of my fundamental weaknesses that I believe, I share with most of the human race.
This just reaffirmed my faith in kindness, goodness and forgiveness. I do sincerely hope and wish to avoid this mistake in the future. I am amused at how the story of someone whom I’ll probably never meet, has opened my eyes in a way that is so profound and intimate. I feel overwhelmed and grateful as I write this. Its humbling and beautiful.
Blog of changes 